Last week I burnt my hand. Brad said it would peel and I would look like a leper but then it got better really quickly so I was all “in your face, Brad!” … But then it began to peel after all so Brad said “In your leprosy-ridden face”. Damn him.

Also I think my hand will fall off.

Then he told this joke about two lepers at a bbq and it wasn’t even remotely funny but he said it is funny and I’m just offended because I have leprosy myself.