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Conversation between my parents, shortly after I mentioned plans for Dad’s 80th birthday party.

Dad: I won’t be 80 next year, will I?

Mum: Yes you will

Dad: I’ll only be 79

Mum: No, you’ll be 79 in a couple of weeks and 80 next year

Dad: (outraged) Who’s responsible for this? They’ll be hearing more from me.