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This conversation actually happened about 4 years ago, but it cracked me up all over again so I thought I ought to reblog it from my old Livejournal.

Kasey: I like to use my iPod to block out irritating types. Praise be to Apple!

Gen: You’re very odd you know. Who worships an apple?

Kasey: Captain Barbosa? Isaac Newton? 

Gen: So there’s three of you. Is this enough to consider you a cult?


Gen: Speaking of apples, I dreamed I was buying an apple. It was breakfast time and I was both hungry and hot, and I decided to stop at a fruit stall and buy a single apple. When I went to pay for it, the guy weighed it, and it came to ten cents. I opened my wallet to take out ten cents, and he said “No, don’t worry about it” but by then I already had the money out and said “No, here it is. I’ll pay for it” but still he refused to let me pay for the apple and he hit my hand with a ruler.

Kasey: Teachers too… teachers like apples and discipline by ruler. Doctors hate apples, same as vampires hate garlic. So anyone who felt that doctors were the anti-Christ would like apples. Which means that all of those religions/cults that refuse medical treatment would likely worship some kind of apple-based deity. The list is growing.

Gen: Huh. So it is. Soon you might have a following. You could be a prophet. And then, in the future, when people have forgotten that you only spread the word about apples, and did not in fact create them yourself, they will begin to worship you instead. You will become the Apple God. Like Apollo. Only spelled different.